Christmastime is a magical time full of lights, music, good food and extra time with friends and family. Experiencing Christmastime through a child’s eyes is especially joyful as they take in all the wonder the season has to offer. Part of you is probably reliving some of your favorite holiday childhood memories through your own children. With all the joy Christmas brings, have you ever wondered why your toddler or preschooler seems particularly out of sorts? The frequent meltdowns might be leading you to add one special thing to the top of your Christmas list: a calm child. But you won’t need Santa or even Christmas magic to make this Christmas wish come true. With a few intentional tweaks to your holiday plans you can truly experience a season that is “calm and bright.”
How to have a Calm Child by Christmas
The countdown is on! We are a week away from Christmas, and that means there is still time to have a calm child before the magical morning arrives! Young children thrive on predictability. While Christmas brings with it a lot of fun, it also brings major disruptions to your child’s typical rhythms. Holiday parties, visitors and decorations may mean extra sugar, late nights, and increased sensory input. Consistent routines help regulate your child’s stress responses, but the regular shifts in these routines to accommodate holiday festivities can overload your little one’s nervous system. Consider the ways chaos may be creeping into your holiday plans this season, and feel empowered to make choices that help create calm for you and your whole family!
Choose Calm over Chaos
One of the number one stressors for kids during the holidays is experiencing their parents’ stress. Did you know young children are incredibly in-tune to our emotions, and they experience them with us? That means, if you are stressed, they are stressed too. Adults often feel pressure to “do it all,” during the Christmas season. But the best gift we can give our children is Calm. It turns out that while chaos is contangious, so is calm! Give yourself permission to choose carefully what events you will participate in over the next week, and which you will leave behind to make sure everyone is feeling regulated. This may mean ditching traditions that don’t serve you anymore or buying less to decrease the financial pinch this year.
Keep the routine (mostly) sacred
You don’t have to cancel all the holiday fun, but anchoring the day or week with familiar routines goes a long way. Keep meal times, rest times and transitions as consistent as possible. If you have to stay out late for one special activity this season, consider what the recovery time will be like. Back to back parties or late nights are almost always a recipe for meltdowns. Consider leaving a party early to maintain your child’s bedtime routine and create wind-down time for yourself. Perhaps your child loves staying out late but is a grinch the next day. Have you built on rest on the other side of the festivities? These rhythms will help regulate little hearts, minds and bodies in the midst of all the festivities.
Channel the energy, don’t fight it!
When your preschooler is feeling overstimulated by all the Christmas magic, moving their body is actually a great way to channel that energy! While it’s tempting to ask them to sit still and be calm, keep in mind that movement is actually the key to accessing that calm. Here at Heartland, we like to get creative with the Christmas-themed activities that get your little one moving, and you can incorporate these fun activities at home, as well!
- Consider creating a “reindeer games” obstacle course in your basement.
- Play “freeze dance” to Christmas songs in just about any room in the house! Put on your favorite holiday tunes, let the kids wiggle, and when you push pause, they FREEZE until you start the music again.
- Another fun game is the Santa Sack bean bag toss. Let your kids practice tossing bean bags into a bucket, or hitting a target you create on the floor with tape or paper squares.
- And we mustn’t forget hugs! Giving great big holiday squeezes help release tension and release feel-good endorphins to calm your kiddo!
Teach Emotions Alongside Festivities
Children experience big emotions around the holidays like anticipation, disappointment, and overstimulation. But they often lack the language to express them. The month of December offers an incredible opportunity to teach social-emotional regulation to your children, which is foundational to early childhood development. If you want to foster a calm spirit in your preschooler, look for books that teach children about waiting and patience like, “I’ll wait, Mr. Panda.” Use visuals like an emotion wheel to help your child develop language around what they are feeling. 
If your child is feeling particularly overstimulated, consider leading them through a simple breathing exercise like “smell the cocoa,” where they take a deep breath through their nose and imagine smelling a warm cup of hot chocolate, and “blow out the candle.” Prompt your child to blow out through his mouth like he is blowing out a Christmas candle. You may be surprised how taking just 15-30 seconds can help reset your little one and have them back enjoying all the fun this season has to offer.
Less Chaos, More Magic
If all you want for Christmas is a calm child, you’re not alone! Adjusting the holiday schedule doesn’t mean eliminating joy, it means protecting it! We at Heartland are committed to partnering with you to create calm and festive experiences for your children. As we work together to prioritize routines, teach emotional regulation, and create intentional fun, children can experience the holidays as fun instead of overwhelming. And that’s a real gift. We have found that the best memories are not made in chaos, but in spaces where children feel safe, understood, and just festive enough. Wishing you and your family the happiest- and calmest- holiday season! If you are interested in joining us here at Heartland after the New Year, with us today!